It’s beginning to feel a lot like July of 2021.

Which is to say, “bloody awful.” I’m ready to throw in the towel on here and YouTube. My readership is down. I’m not getting the YouTube watch hours or subscribers I need. It’s like no one cares. (Yes you’re here and thank you!)

Maybe it’s the depression talking. I dunno. I do everything and anything I hear I’m supposed to do on YouTube and it’s not working. I can’t afford a coach or a course. I’m not sure if YouTube is just not for me or if the timing is all wrong. I don’t know right now.

I’m starting to reexamine what got me into blogging in the first place. What got me into YouTube besides the fact that it’s on nearly 24/7 around me? I can tell you it’s not for the money on so many levels. I’m not advertising anything yet. I vent my feelings on here but not on YouTube. All the YT coaches and such say, “No one cares about you as a person.”

Disclaimer: This is my blog. This is how I see things and how I feel. There is little factual information being presented. If you have issue with anything being presented, please contact me privately on X (Twitter,) Instagram, BlueSky, or by email. Otherwise, there are lots of platforms out there for you to vent your feelings and opinions, too.

Note: In a twist of divine synchronicity, the days I scheduled for a hiatus saw the release of a new Dragonbane adventure and at least two major news pieces; one with a conspiracy attached. YouTube is still on break for a while. I might get some videos put together on the back end, but there’s a lot going on outside of gaming this weekend. We’ll see.

Not to mention I take a couple of days off of writing and a major conspiracy in the TableTop RolePlaying Game sphere becomes obvious and no one is talking about it yet. Mark my words. It’s out there and it’s real. Someday soon everyone is going to see it. And I’ll probably cover it if I haven’t already. (I write this article a bit in advance sometimes.)

Getting canned from my last job was still the best thing that could have happened.

Somewhere amongst my physical pain, my bizarre mental health, chasing kids, cooking and doing chores, I have tons of free time. LOL! Okay, I have some free time and cats. I have a choice of what to do with some of my day.

I can do solo TTRPG play for example. I can mope around and play Fortnite for three hours before I pick kids up from school. I can write an article, watch a horror movie, and play Heroes of the Storm which is kinda my routine right now. However, there are some things that are practically impossible right now.

I have a wife, four children and three fuzzballs that live here. One of my children graduated from High School last year and hasn’t left the nest yet so to speak. That particular child only works a few hours per week if at all and has sparse community college classes. The rest of the time is spent screaming at a computer or phone. It’s nigh onto impossible to film a video.

When I’m blessed with having the house to myself like I did last year I get to meditate, sleep, maybe take a nice shower and then do all the other things. I take meditation very seriously. I rarely have the peace and quiet I need to read, do any lengthy writing, or relax completely these days. I have to take my moments in short bursts or when everyone is asleep.

All of that having been said, I wouldn’t trade it for any 9 to 5 job you could hire me for. The government lads basically determined I was “unhireable” so that’s probably for the best. My little corner of the writing niche would seem to be perfect for my schedule, disposition, and education. This blog has kept me more-or-less sane for the past three years. Will I make it to Blog-o-versary Year 3? I’m not sure.

I’m truly happy and grateful for all of you. I might be barking in the dark, but at least some of my neighbors on the Internet can hear me. You’re the best.

I want to end this article on a couple of positive notes.

Please go follow my friend Knigobi on YouTube. Her Dungeon Master ideas are fresh. She’s super talented outside of gaming from what I can see. She contributes a ton to the TTRPG community overall and I’m truly grateful for her. Knigobi’s channel is also linked over on the side of my blog on the right. –>

Also, please support my good friend and “Boss,” the OG GM. Please help him hit 2,001 and beyond subscribers this year. I help him discover new channels every week. He’s also helping build the community up and keep us informed of TTRPG industry news during the week. OG is also a very gifted TTRPG writer among other interests. His link is also over here –>

Thank you for being here with me today. I appreciate you. Keep it real, but please strive for positivity, too. Please embrace the things that bring you the most joy in your life.