Ahh. Another one of my favorite categories/creatures.

The Muppet Golem (Kid friendly version.)

No one is sure who built this hilariously frightening monstrosity or why. It’s large and furry with claws that can rend the hardest armor. It is unyielding once unleashed, fulfilling some final purpose known only to it. The Muppet Golem understands not reason, but comedic levels of violence. Possibly the most frightening aspect of this creature are the strange sounds emanating from it as it roams the countryside in search of another village to rampage.

One of many possible variants.

Ohhh!

Ahooogah!

Woop Woop!

Menah menah. Doo-do do-do-do.

Ohh heh heh heh heh.

Wakka Wakka!

Muppet Golem

Description: A silly face with lots of teeth and huge eyes sits atop a long tubular neck. The body is that of a giant yellow bird. One arm is furry and brown ending in dull claws. The other arm is blue and has feathers of a different bird. The legs are fuzzy and end in huge, fuzzy, green frog feet. To top it all off, the Golem has a big, fuzzy dragon-like tail.

Variations on this monster come in red, orange, blue, green, purple, yellow, and plaid.

Explosive: When a golem is reduced to zero HP, the magic that sustains it is released in the form of a  rather silly explosion. Everyone within 4 meters is covered in stuffing and silly string.

Resistance: Takes half damage from piercing and slashing weapons.

Squishy and Full of Floof: Since the Muppet Golem is full of stuffing, it has no internal organs or blood. Therefore, rolling a dragon has no effect when attacking the creature.

Highly Flammable: The hardest part of being a Muppet Golem is vulnerability to fire. The creature takes double damage from fire attacks and continues to burn for 1d6 damage per round for 1d4 rounds or until extinguished. Being on fire will cause the creature to flee and run toward the nearest source of water.

Persuadable: The Muppet Golem can be PERSUADED not to attack. It might even be sort of friendly.

Ferocity: 2              Size: Large
Movement: 10      Armor: 4              HP: 64

Muppet Golem ATTACKS

D6 Attacks:

1: AAAAuugh! The golem flails its long, fuzzy arms in all directions, hitting everyone within 2 meters. The attack inflicts 1d6 bludgeoning damage and knocks the victims down.

2: HUG? The Muppet Golem charges up to 10 meters and attempts to wrap its arms around one creature. Unless successfully Dodged, the victim is incapacitated for one round while being hugged and squeezed and loved and called “George.” No damage.

3: Honk Honk! Beep Beep! WooHoo! The golem bounds forward up to 10 meters knocking down any creature of Medium size or smaller and inflicting 1d6 bludgeoning damage.

4: Woosh! The Golem spins around, knocking over anyone within 4 meters with its tail. 1d6 bludgeoning damage each.

5: Womp Womp. The Muppet Golem attempts to aggressively pet one character on the head for 2d6 bludgeoning damage. Helmets may prevent some of the damage.

6: Om Nom Nom Nom! The Muppet Golem has fuzzy foam teeth and no stomach, or even a throat for that matter. It gnaws on the head of a character like it was a giant lollipop while making the sound. 1d6 bludgeoning damage, helmets reduce the damage. Character is incapacitated for the round they are being gnawed upon.

The golem moves on after it has hugged everyone nearby at least once or if everyone is knocked down. At no point in time is the Muppet Golem interested in truly hurting everyone. It just wants to play.

This game is not affiliated with, sponsored, or endorsed by Fria Ligan AB.
This Supplement was created under Fria Ligan AB’s Dragonbane Third Party Supplement License.